Clean Panties and I Don't Wanna Go

Dropping my child at daycare is never a pleasant experience. Since the aforementioned time where Audrey ran into the arms of one of the other children, barely acknowledging my departure, things have returned to the norm gotten a lot worse. She got out of bed on the wrong side of bed this morning, so I knew that I was in for it. She was actually telling me that she didn’t want to get out of bed this morning, though she got out of bed to tell me so. I promptly responded by telling her to go potty and to don some clean panties. She didn’t like this very much. A battle of wills ensued and after a tug-of-war dressing, lots of tears and a big, long hug, we were off to school, which was exactly where she didn’t want to go, because she didn’t want to go anywhere. She wanted to stay in bed or at the very least home – anything to keep from having to go to the new school. I am really growing concerned about her disdain for the place. Upon arrival, Audrey walked beside me pleasantly enough, but the moment the young teacher assistant greeted her, Audrey was crying and scaled me quicker than a logman in a tree-climbing contest. It was so hard to peel her away as she cried “mommy” again and again. The TA took Audrey from me and with a last glance at Audrey’s scrunched up face, tears, cries for me not to leave her, and arms reaching, stretching for me, I started to walk away then Susan, the owner, said, “My, she must come from a happy home. She loves her mommy soooo much,” in the sing-songy voice that daycare providers have. I looked at Susan and just wanted to claw her eyes out. It was just not the right time for it. My heart is so heavy. I feel Audrey’s pain. I don’t want to leave her, especially when she is so affected, but I gotta have that paycheck. Money makes the world go round, right?